Week 10: Yasmine

11/4/2020

Prompt:
Two brothers despise each other more than they can possibly say. Will they feel the same after one of them is gone?

Word Count: 175-275 words

Expectations:
-Remember that you are writing for the King's Academy community. Please be respectful of that community.
-Respect the word count
-Your work should have a title--this is not part of your word count.
-Include your full name and word count at the end of your submission.
-Have fun with this challenge.

Deadline:
22:00 Tuesday, November 10th

Photo Source:
https://www.wisconsinhistory.org/Records/Image/IM49363

6 Comments

Jumana

11/6/2020 03:00:42 am

Dave is my twin bro and we always hated each other, we always fought and pranked one another but....

I may regret this but I may not. I despise him so much. I have to do something about him without getting caught, I decided to make a trap that will elapse him forever! I wish he hates me more up there, more than he hates me down here.

My mom is crying, wanna know why? Her favorite son died. They found him in the lake after he was missing!! I cannot believe this, my dear brother what happened to you. How is my life supposed to be without you? Well I guess much better than before.

It’s been two years, in fact the best two years of my life. I am treated like a king on a throne. Everything he has is now my own and I finally slept in my room alone.

Everyone does not know what happened to Dave but I guess my wish was granted and he is now in his grave.

Jawad Alazzeh

11/6/2020 09:24:50 am

Finding Happiness

My earliest memory of my brother is his fist flying at my face. My first ER run was a broken wrist. He had twisted my arm too far. The burn on my upper arm was his cigarette being put off on me, the scar’s grow tesk and still weeps. Today was the day he was going to kill me. I had heard his laughter this morning telling Sydney, his best friend. I was not ready to die. I had prepared myself by sneaking my step father’s knife into my back pocket to protect myself.

After school he took me down to the lake, he punched me repeatedly. I felt almost numb. He held my ragged body, and pushed my breathless face into the water, drowning me. I could barely reach for the knife. My fingers clutched at it. I gathered my remaining strength and resolved. I felt a lapse in his push. I turned and stabbed blindly. He fell backwards. I did not feel horror. I felt I had awakened from a nightmare. I felt...good.

I looked down and smiled, this man who had devoured my childhood lay bleeding. He wasn’t dead yet, but he would be soon. I felt I should be debating saving him; but the thought did not cross my mind. I sat on the damp grass, cross-legged, peacefully, and watched his dying moments. He looked up and said, “I knew this world was only big enough for one of us. I should have killed you earlier.” I think of his hollow eyes sometimes, his last glance as I rolled him into the lake, and I smile.

Jawad Alazzeh
Word Count: 271 words

Mar

11/10/2020 10:29:54 am

The womb
A man walks down the street wearing a coat in the heavy electric november air, a beanie covers his hair. This in itself isn't odd but if you knew him like you really knew him you would know he always wears it to the back so that it sags and wrinkles at the back and flops when he walks. Today it's pulled nearly over his eyes. His pace is quick, his feet moving so fast he's nearly running. “He's late” you would think if you passed him in the streat, but if you knew him like you know yourself you would know he's really running away. His nearly black brown eyes refuse to make eye contact with the world instead averting to random directions. If you knew this man more than he knew himself you would know he rarely did this except for when he woke up in cold sweat somewhere around midnight and he thought no one was watching. A cold wind rocks the street. But it passes right through him as he stares coldly at the door of the hospital at the end of the streat. The hospital where he will find out that he murdered his own brother in the womb.

Jaafar Wahbeh

11/10/2020 11:29:13 am

Sons of Adam
Cain and Abel, a story as old as time, showing us a lasting trait in our human nature that ticks inside us like the hands of a clock. Well my friend you can say my story takes a kind of similar path. Winds of time blew at my face as I remembered my brother Hamza.

A young lad with blonde hair as golden alluring sun rays.
I was remembering as I strode down the sidewalk. A passionate human and a true example of a distinguished person. Our childhood years were good days, but not the best… My brother was different, and society hated difference. It always felt that all eyes were haunting him like cobras searching for a little mouse.

However, we were for each other, but not for too long… Glaciers seemed to grow between us throwing us to two different edges leaving me behind sinking slowly in the noxious water with only confetti around. Partying all around was what I did, but I got the looks… ‘The freak’s brother’ a girl was murmuring followed by a sigh and some harsh prejudice. That was the reality of my living; I was convinced, but I am different after all. My brother was in bed holding tight to his pillow, as if he knew his destiny. My ribs prisoned all the fear inside me holding my last breaths in captivity for the rest of my life. Blood was the last thing my hands knew of him… A tear fell off my eyes soothing the pain the flowers lying next to Hamza’s grave growing his lasting flower in heaven…

Jaafar Wahbeh

11/10/2020 11:30:20 am

Word count: 267

Yasmine Najjar

11/11/2020 10:50:17 am

Congrats Jaafar! You win this competition!

The beginning had me hooked which is pretty impressive. The way you brought Adam and Eve and the biblical story of Cain and Abel to a relationship of two modern-day brothers was not only creative but intriguing. The way the narrator expressed reminiscence, sorrow and finally grief was awe-inspiring. The end gave me a chill!

Mar your imagery is astounding, the electrified air, the way you addressed the reader head on and spoke about the ignorance of the city was realistic, engaging and something out of a thriller novel. I really want to know more about this man and his story, getting your reader to want to know more is a feat on its own.

Jawad the way you describe the effects of domestic abuse, even between brothers, is real. It's a real issue that's happening it today and you describe it perfectly. To reveal at the end that it was all a flashback? The narrator by the dead body of his abuser of so many readers? I can imagine this being turned into a book, I would definitely read it.

Jumana your piece was emotional. It didn't use fanciful words for the sake of it, every word and point was there for a reason. I could tell your narrator was angry, was frustrated and finally, relieved. "You wanna know why?" Conveys so much about a character, and it's consistent throughout the story. You even managed to sprinkle the love of a mother in, but still focused on the narrator.

Overall, I had a really hard time choosing just one; your stories are all far beyond ordinary.Thank you for participating in this competition ^^

Try Out Your Words

Week 10: Yasmine

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